When men focus on their urge to punish the rapist with their bare hands, instead of on the victim’s needs — like, moving on after 20 years, for instance? — it reinforces a lot of nasty shit. Like the idea that women belong to their men, and a woman being raped takes something from those men. The idea that violence is best solved with more violence. The idea that making one rapist so sorry he’ll never do it again — which, good luck with that — will do a damned thing to end rape. The idea that women need protection from and by big, tough guys more than we need a woman-friendly culture in which we’re free to move autonomously and safely. The idea that once a rape has happened, there’s anything anyone can do to fix it. A guy still laboring under any or all of those delusions needs to be disabused of them swiftly, as much as he may also need some gentle advice.
Kate Harding, Not That You Asked: Some Advice For An Advice Columnist - cary tennis - Jezebel (via igather)
Source: igather
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